BEFORE...

So you've stumbled upon this paper and are now reading it. You're probably expecting this crazed story about unicorns, how pretty they are and how they have trail rainbows from their rear-end when they jump over canyons. Yeah, that would be cool, but no. I'm giving you a different story; one without unicorns and rainbows. You know what? I’m not even sure if you can say it has a happy ending or not. There was sure some sunlight though on this day though and it was only partly cloudy with temperatures somewhere between 70 and 80 degrees Fahrenheit. It's the exciting story of an outlaw driven by greed to jump rope and deny court rulings. It's a plot so thick like America's Choice Barbecue Sauce that Paramount even asked for movie rights to it. I'll have to get back to you though when they send me back the final decision though. I've been waiting a while. 



AFTER...

So you were probably just doing your own thing when you picked up this paper. You didn’t have much interest and were probably just going to throw it out instead of recycling, I mean, who needs the environment, right? Suddenly you look down and notice how the title to this paper isn’t really a title. It’s a command. You find yourself drawn into reading this paper, and are freaked out by how I’m currently describing everything you’re doing. Is someone watching you? Perhaps someone is, but it’s not me. Then how do I know? I don’t, I’m just assuming, but I’m right, so now I know. Thank you, pawn on my chess board. You’re now given one move per turn under my command, and I’m using that opportunity to share with you this story. “This story?” you ask, intrigued as to what I speak as my words wrap around you like a single light bulb in a dark, closed room. Yes, it is a story, and what a story it is. There are no unicorns though, even though they’re pretty and can shoot rainbows from their rear end, but I must say it’s a good one, either way. It fell on a partly cloudy day, approximately between 70 and 80 degrees Fahrenheit. This is a heart-pounding story of a lone outlaw who is driven by greed to jump rope and deny court rulings. It’s a plot so thick, just like America’s Choice Barbecue Sauce, Paramount even asked for film rights. I turned them down though. I can’t explain why, but I want you now, my reader to enjoy this tale. You really will.